


Pause

by loewen_grube



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 10:51:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14714666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loewen_grube/pseuds/loewen_grube
Summary: Hanzo had time to think.





	Pause

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a friend. This was supposed to have two more chapters, but I forgot how they were supposed to go, lol.

He might hate to admit it, but Hanzo has thought of it in a while.

In the many years he has lived, being heir to a huge yakuza empire does not really give him much pause, and so finding that he was given an option, a _choice,_ was overwhelming enough.

But being free from all that, he gave himself pause, just being here. And though letting in someone in his life as softly as he has was rather sudden, Hanzo couldn’t help but feel like it was meant to happen this way.

After all, it was easy getting used to having Jesse on his bed almost every night. Sometimes, they slept. Sometimes, they don’t. Sometimes, they just spend hours talking before either of them falls asleep. And if anyone could have told Hanzo this will be a situation he could easily get used to, a setup he can’t bear not having him, he’d be livid.

And it makes him feel odd he’s actually scared of losing someone.

He’s thought about it for a while, because for a long time, it was his doing that made him unhappy. It was Hanzo’s choice to follow his elders. It was his choice to kill his brother. It was his choice to leave, to make himself feel bitter, it was his choice to mourn the brother that was before, not the one he has with him right now. He told himself that the only path that remains is to die an honorable death, and all he had to do was _wait._

He waited, and fate has given Jesse to him.

And he gives himself another choice.

“Jesse?”

It takes a few moments before he replies. With the time, it’s not so surprising, with the dawn light just peeking out the window. “Mm?”

“Will you be doing something after our recon next week?”

Another pause as he orients himself with the light, and gives himself a few moments to think about it. “What’s up?”

“I have been.... thinking of something important to tell you.”

Jesse sits up, rubs the sleepiness from his eyes, before looking back at Hanzo. “What’s up with now? Can’t tell it to me right now?”

“I do need to collect my thoughts,” Hanzo says. Seeing him sit up, Jesse picks up his prosthetic arm from the nightstand and puts it on before wrapping it around his lover’s tattooed shoulder. “And this setup is not exactly one you can call... ideal _.”_

“What’s not ideal about you being here’n my bed?” He laughs and blows a kiss against Hanzo’s cheek. “Could think of a hundred ways we can make this sweeter, but you’re the cake, hun. That seems sweet’n ideal enough, right?”

Hanzo couldn’t help but laugh, but morning grogginess made it come out funny and weak. “A lot of things, _Jesse._ But please, I do want to say something I’d like time to prepare for.” He settles against Jesse’s shoulder, almost lost in thought. “Can you free your schedule for Sunday after the recon?”

“Sure.” Jesse doesn’t even think about it. “I always have time for you, sunshine.” A kiss, another gentle pull closer, like it’s routine he puts love into everyday. “Will talk to the old geezers ‘bout it later. D’you wanna get up, while you’re still partly awake?”

Jesse is unbelievably warm, and the morning air around the base is rather chilly, and it’s not a weather he wants to walk around naked into, or even try working to. “No,” he says, “Let your sunshine rest. We don’t have work.”

“Sure, sunshine,” Jesse says, “take all the time you need restin’.”

Of course, it’s going to take a while for him to prepare for this, or to even think about preparing for it. Hanzo really wishes he can say it now, when there’s time, when there’s still him. But this sort of thing takes time. He commits to a choice to make himself happy for once, after all, and it needs all the time it can get.

For one, he still don’t have a ring.


End file.
